Wow. So I really did not expect to run headfirst into this. I am realizing that a lot of my stress over finding work likely comes from a good load of upper middle class expectations.
Thinking about it… I got out of high school, went to college, got out of college and after an internship and some traveling, start looking for ways to get paid to do social change work. Not a totally atypical story for someone with leftish politics, and my class standing.
Now after three years of telling my mother I did NOT want to be a professional, I’m busy spending my time trying to find some way to fit my politics into a job structure. Not entirely anarchist of me.
Acknowledging that I want to eat, and live in a house or apartment or something I need to figure out a way to earn money. Up until a few months ago, I was perfectly fine with that way to make money being childcare, but as my travels have gone on and the prospect of being out of money and back home looms the prospect of professionalizing myself bears down on me.
What does professionalizing myself mean? Does it mean getting paid to do something I enjoy? Probably not. Does it mean adhering to authority and exerting authority over others, probably.
So is there a way for me to navigate this minefield? Am I focusing on this part of going on with life to avoid thinking about what other things the change means? Like changing community, safety, responsibility…